Dear John.

Okay, I did it. I wrote Rick a Dear John Hey Rick letter. It was very nice, polite, and above all, honest. I told him that I enjoyed hanging out with him and thought he was a great guy, but really didn't feel that he was very interested in me, and I wished him good luck. And no, I did not get a response, not that I would really expect one.

This devite (new word!) allowed me to invite Badge to my party. He has plans in the evening (basketball game), but will stop by a little later. Oh, and if you read this blog and are coming to my party, please remind me to tell you his actual name, so you don't slip and call him Badge. That would be bad. But funny.

Post o' updates

Yeah, yeah, I'm a slacker. I know. Will it help if I tell you that my slackocity was due to spending ALL weekend (seriously, like 10 hours on both Saturday and Sunday) doing work stuff? No? Oh, well it was worth a try...

Hmm, where to start...

Rick
I'll start with Rick because I have a little dilemma with that situation. A few weeks ago, back when I was still felt there was potential, I sent him an evite to a little soire I'm having this weekend, to which he immediately RSVP'd he would attend. Flash forward to now. We haven't "talked" since early last week (and by talked I mean emailed). With any other guy, I would assume they would have figured it out, and would not expect them to show up. But this is Rick, the SRV. Okay, probably not the V part, but he is a little clueless when it comes to dating. I was thinking about sending him a nice email, saying something like "I know we haven't really been talking much, but ::blah blah blah:: and I wish you the best of luck." It seems a little less harsh than using the evite "univite" tool (btw, did you know they had that? Awesome.). And like I said, normally, I would just let it go, but I feel like there's a slight chance he would show up. Which wouldn't be a huge deal, except that....

Badge
...things are going really well with Badge and I'd like to invite him. We had our real (non-coffee) date on Friday. First thing I noticed? This guy has great manners. As in opens-my-car-door-every-time manners. We went to a resturant where the wait was an hour and a half, so we left and went somewhere else. We were at dinner for a long time and went to a bar after. When we finally got back to his place (I drove to his place and then we drove together from there) we sat in his car and talked for a while. Finally he was like "Is it okay if I kiss you?" Awww. I don't think I've ever been asked that before. So we did. And it was great.

He went snowboarding on Saturday and actually texted me a couple of times during the day. He then called me when he got back to the car to see when I wanted to get together again. Any guy who calls me while in a car with his guy friends scores some points.

Badge came over last night. We both were tired from the weekend and decided just to watch a movie on my couch. So we did. Followed by second movie. And some making out. Because that's how I roll. Apparently.

Doc
Doc and I spent most of last week texting back and forth. But he never asked to see me again. On Thursday I finally just asked him if we were going to get together.
His response: "Sure we can get together and hang out."
Me: "Unless you don't want to."
Him: "No that's fine...we can hang out."
Me: "Ha, you sound so convincing."

Okay, I get it, he's not interested, fine. He followed up by saying he was busy through the weekend, so I said we could figure something out next week. And he sent me an "okay sounds good :)" response. And I didn't text back. Fast forward to last night, Badge is over, we're comfortably watching a movie. I get a text, which I ignore. Unfortunately, Phoney McPodderson (my iPhone) does not appreciate being ignored, so I continue to get new message notifications every couple of minutes. I finally get up and check, and it's a text from Doc, asking how my weekend was.

I thought guys were supposed to be so simple and easy? Either ask me out or don't. Really, whichever route you take is fine. But don't NOT ask me out, act like you're not interested when I bring it up, and then revive the conversation after nothing for four days. That's all I'm saying.

Okay, so this was a long post, sorry about that. Any advice on the Rick and Doc situations would be super...As for Badge, I think I've got that one handled :) Oh, and I'm too lazy to proof read this, so I apologize for any errors.

Clarification

Okay, I think I must have been a little less than eloquent when I wrote my last post regarding Rick. While I made it sound that I was annoyed at always having to make the plans, it's more that I'm always taking the initiative to do anything at all. Like when I made him cookies for Christmas, I mentioned that I needed to drop them off at some point before I went out of town for the holidays. His response? "Okay." Not "okay, why don't you come by after work tomorrow" or even "this is a rough week, would you be able to just drop them on my doorstep." Does that make sense? All of this pretty much left me with the feeling that He's Just Not that Into Me. Which is why I decided to give the reins to him.

As of right now, this is sort of a moo point. After not initiating contact with him, he sent me some texts yesterday, followed by an email this morning, inviting me over after work to watch a football game. I had plans and couldn't make it, but it was nice to see him doing some asking.

I thought boys were supposed to be simple?

Isn't that how it works? Boys are easy and simple, and girls are crazy and hormonal?

Things with Rick are going well. Well, they are going. I still enjoy hanging out with him, that much I know. Remember at the beginning how he was such a great plan-maker? Now, I sort of feel like I'm always the one making plans. I spent three years in a relationship as the one who almost always had to take charge, and it's not something I'm looking for again. One of the things that initially attracted me to Rick was that he seemed to be a take-charge sort of guy. But I don't see that at all anymore.

Last night we went to the movies (my suggestion). We did the usual hand-holding and kiss good night, but I wasn't really feeling it from him. So I vowed to not contact him until I heard from him- you know, put the ball in his court. Sure enough, he sent me a text this morning. I'm fairly confident in saying that he's interested in me, I think it's more that he's not wanting to scare me off. Or something like that. Or maybe the opposite of that. Wait, I don't even know what that would be.

As of now I have no set plans for New Years. I'm hoping he'll ask me to do something, or ask what I'm doing, or something like that...because I would like to spend it with him, but I just don't want to be the one to bring it up.

Have any of my loyal readers been in a situation like this?

On another note, I've been emailing a new guy from Match. He's actually someone I heard from a long time ago, but for some reason we never met up. I'm going to call him Stretch, because he's 6'6". How awesome is that? I'm a sucker for tall guys...

NOT an SRV

Don't read too much into this statement, but Rick is not an SRV. No, it's not something I discovered first hand; it's something I deduced by the fact that he's an awesome kisser. That's right folks, we've made it to first base. And it was fantastic, definitely worth the really long wait...Not the way I would imagine an SRV to kiss...at all. I mean, it could just be that he is an SRV, and all of his "focus" has gone into mastering the kiss, but I'm going to assume not. Actually, at this point I don't even care if he is or isn't, because I've got enough to keep me *ahem* occupied for a while.

I would normally fill in the date details here, but really, do you even care? Okay, okay, short version: he won at Trivial Pursiut (damn world travelers who read the news every day...I mean who knows what country borders Denmark?), we watched Top Gun, started off sitting next to each other on the couch, ended up in a less vertical position. Got home at 1:30am.

I think it's all figured out...

I spent half of Friday fretting about the previous night. My friends all offered their advice. The most popular opinion was raised by J, who is positive that Rick is a "socially retarded virgin." So much, in fact, that his nickname amongst my "friends" is now SRV. Charming, I know.

After our usual texting back and forth Friday morning, I asked Rick what the stakes were for our impending Trivial Pursuit challenge. He said he'd have to think about it. A little while later, I got this text (warning- please swallow any liquid that is currently in your mouth, as to avoid spitting it all over your computer screen):

"If I win, you have to watch either the Godfather or Rocky, and I get a kiss on the cheek."

Did you catch that last part? Yep, on the cheek. I could barely read it out loud without laugh hysterically. Not that it was all that funny, just a little unbelievable. On the cheek? After six, yes 6, dates, he is aiming for a kiss on the cheek? Hmm. Maybe SRV is a good name after all. I decided to sack up and use this opportunity to put it on the line:

"Okay, but if win we are watching either Pride and Prejudice (the short version) or Sex and the City, but I want a real kiss."

He then responded that if I'm raising the stakes then he is too, to both an actual kiss and being forced to watch either the Rocky or Godfather series in their entirety. I countered by adding in the 5 hour BBC version of Pride and Prejudice.

It seems that all is well. Our Trivial Pursuit challenge is on Tuesday night, and assuming we don't tie, I should finally make it to (drum roll, please) 1st base. I'm thinking I might just get it over with as soon as we meet up...I would hate for the impending event to impact my trivia skills. Since, after all, that's what is important.

Date 3.5 + .5

Okay, so tonight I had my 4th date with Rick. I was at 3.5 before, and tonight's events qualify as a half date, hence the #4. I would like to preface this post by saying I've had a bit to drink, so I apologize for any incoherence or misspellings.

Blogger J came over to accompany to the bar-like establishment across the street from my new place. I invited Rick to join us, which he did. We were a few drinks in before he arrived. Once he got there everything was fine. We were having fun playing pool and darts, not to mention the eating and drinking. The time came when J's boy arrived to drive her home. So, it was just the two of us (I'll skip the part where J breaks my brand new iphone). Everything is fine. We leave. I ask if he is going to drive me home, since I don't want to walk across the street by myself. He drives me home. I get out of the car. That's it. He doesn't walk me to my door, reach to hug me goodnight, anything. Nada. Fast forward 30 minutes, I fix my iphone. I text him, something to the extent of "home you made it home safe." He texts back, immediately: "Yep! That was fun...I want a rematch." Oh, did I mention I beat him at pool?

If there was ever the perfect opportunity to try fot 1st base, that was it. I was somewhat tipsy and could have used an escort up the stairs to my place. But he didn't even offer. So, to my readers, what in the world is going on? I'm getting fairly frustrated by the whole thing. He is a really nice guy and I get along with him really well, but it's getting ridiculous. What do you think?

Welcome to 7th grade

Rick and I had originally planned for a Sunday evening date- he was going to come over and I was going to cook for him. This was partially because my parents were staying with me for Thanksgiving and originally weren't supposed to leave until Sunday. They ended up leaving Saturday morning, and after having spent the previous three days with lots of family, some non-family social time sounded great. Plus I really didn't feel like cooking. We decided on dinner and a movie.

The movie started at 6:00, and I wanted to get there early so I could buy the tickets. But he beat me and had the tickets in hand. Darn punctuality. We saw Four Christmases which was hilarious. I recommend seeing it, it's worth $10. Anyway, as we were sitting in the theater, he was super fidgety. Finally, after about 20 minutes, he grabbed my hand....hence the name of this post. I totally felt like I was in middle school...not that I had a boyfriend for any period longer than two weeks, but you know what I mean.

After dinner we went next door and had sushi. As usual there was no trouble conversing. End of the night came, and I got (drumroll, please).......a hug! Yeah. That was date 3.5. I understand the awkwardness of a busy parking lot and stuff, but still, I just want to get the whole first kiss thing over with (I know, I'm quite the romantic). I think our next date will be at one of our houses, so that should do the trick.

On a side note, I've noticed something sort of odd. Every time we've met we've driven separately...and not once has he walked me to my car. He's an extremely polite person, so it was just something that I found strange. We always walk to the parking lot and part ways and walk to our respective cars (And Haley, I'm not making a big deal out of it, just something I noticed!). We haven't set up our next date yet, we just said we would figure it out.

Also, I had to call It's Just Lunch to give them my new phone number (I finally broke down and got a local #), and while I was at it, I told them I was ready for my next match. Yes, I 'm going to keep dating Rick, because I really do like him and think we're a good match...but I also paid for this service and would like to see what else they have to offer.

And yet another date...

Apparently some of you are eagerly waiting for this blog...sorry! I've been very busy at work this morning, thus the delay. And by "very busy," I mean planning my black Friday shopping.

Anyway...Rick emailed me yesterday with three options for dinner. Out of the three, I chose Italian. I mean, who can pass up Italian? Dinner was at 6:30. I was a little frantic due to a last minute rescue mission I had to perform. At lunch yesterday, I get a call from my friends' sister. Turns out that she, my friend, my friend's husband, and their kid were stranded in the middle of nowhere about an hour and a half east of where I live. They were flying their plane from Salt Lake to CA and an engine blew out, so they had to make an emergency landing. And the "airport" where they landed was really an unmanned airstrip in the middle of nowhere. So I rescued them.

Where was I...

Oh, frantic. So I'm a planner, and the rescue mission was obviously an unforeseen kink...not that it was any trouble, but I had to make some adjustments to my game plan. Plus I was freaked out by their experience enough to where I needed a drink. An nice Italian dinner with wine was just what I needed. We have no trouble talking to each other, no awkward silence, nothing like that. We didn't even end up leaving until after 9. He walked me back to my car, gave me a hug, and I offered to cook dinner for him on Sunday. I was wondering if he was going to try and make any sort of move, but it would have been really awkward in the fully lit parking lot, so I was okay when he didn't. So I'll be seeing him again on Sunday and I'm definitely looking forward to it.

And by the way, he now sends me emails every morning with a summary of the major local, regional, world, and sports news...I then forward this to my co-workers, so they all really like him too :)

Date with Rick

I got a text from Rick on Saturday. He had four date ideas, all good, and wanted me to pick. Bowling was an option and the obvious choice. He then called ahead to find a bowling alley that didn't have league play going on. That's right folks, we've got a planner. It was so refreshing to have someone take charge and figure out the details for once! Bowling was fun. We played five games (which seems like a lot, but goes really fast with only two people). He won 3,I won 2. No, I didn't let him win.

Bowling alley observations:

*There was a lovely lesbian couple in the lane next to us. I'm pretty sure the boy one was hitting on me. S/he talked to me a lot.

*There was a man who had a front mullet...as in a beard that was braided at his chin, and was easily a foot long.

*Next time I bowl I am going to wear pajama pants, a flannel shirt, and a raiders jersey over the flannel shirt. I feel I didn't fit in with my crazy outfit of jeans and a polo shirt.

Anyway, everything went really well. At the end of the evening he asked if I wanted to get together some time that week. I don't know if I've ever been asked out for a future date while still on the date. I liked it, at least from him. Luckily I did want to go out again. So Tuesday it is...and of course, I'll keep you posted.

21 hours and 31 minutes

21 hours and 31 minutes.

That's how long it took. For what? For IJL Rick to text me, that's what! Anything under 24 hours tells me that he's not into stupid games, a la waiting three days to call. In a nutshell, he told me he had a great time and he hoped I did too.

Since I'm moving tomorrow and Saturday, the weekend is sort of crazy for me, but it looks like we're meeting up on Sunday evening. I have no idea what we'll do, and I'm hoping he'll take the reins and plan something...I'm definitely ready for a "take charge" kind of guy.

Huh, these people might be on to something...

Last night was my date with Rick, the guy from IJL. Really it was more of a first meeting than a date, since it was just for drinks. I have to say it went very well! He was cute, although a little smaller than I prefer. He also looked older than 28. But still cute. My first impression was that he was very polite (as in if I was talking and he wanted to add something, he would say it, then apologize for cutting in) and nice. He seems intelligent and well-mannered and all that good stuff. We also have a lot in common in terms of interests. He has a dog for which he has joint custody with his parents (as he describes it), so he understood my whole cat thing. We ended up talking about everything from brothels to football, and by the time we left it was 9:30. Yep, we had been there for three hours.

Now he's the potentially awkward part about IJL. At the end of the date, it is up to us to exchange contact info. If we don't, we can't get it from IJL. It made me sort of nervous towards the end, not knowing if he would ask for my info...not that I didn't think he would, but you never know, right? As we were getting up to leave he asked if I would like to get together some time, so I gave him my info. It's funny, we both hate the phone, so he told me he'd send a text message or email, and I told him that was perfect.

So now the waiting game begins...how long before I hear from him? I know, that's the age-old question.

Tomorrow...

The It's Just Lunch (IJL) people have confirmed my date for tomorrow...it's at6:30 at a local trendy bar/restaurant place. Apparently Rick, my match, is really excited about it and even offered to drive here (he lives about 20 minutes away). Wish me luck!

A new date and a new direction

Hmm, what are you guys going to be more excited about, a new date or a new direction? I guess I'll start with the shorter story- the new date.

The new date. He's someone I met the old-fashioned way, on match.com. We chatted online a little bit last week, then got busy, then managed to arrange a date for next week. I don't know a ton about him other than that he's cute and a lawyer. And from Detroit. So I'll call him Detroit. Our date is tentatively scheduled for Thursday, so I'll keep you posted.

The new direction. Having been somewhat disappointed in the online dating experience, I've decided to try something new. It's called It's Just Lunch. Heard of it? It's a matchmaking service where the idea is you only meet up for lunch or drinks after work, and that's it. If you like the person you exchange info at the end of your date. Then you call and give your feedback to your matchmaker, and they take that into account when making your next match. I was a little skeptical for various reasons, so I only signed up for a 4 month trial. I'm guaranteed at least one match every three weeks, but can get them much more often than that if I so desire.

I was told they would call me Monday with my first match (I just went and met with them today at lunch), so I was pleasantly surprised when they called this afternoon. My first match is named Rick and he's an attorney as well (I have to use their real names because that's basically all I know about the person). So I said I'd give him a try ("accept the match") and am waiting to hear if he does the same. From that point, It's Just Lunch will call and make a reservation for us somewhere. I just show up, give the hostess my name, and he will do the same, and we'll magically end up at the same table. I'm really looking forward to see what comes of this service. And best of all for my three readers is that there will once again be fresh material! Lucky you!