Hope,
I hope you had a nice weekend and enjoyed Vegas. I know I have been out of touch lately so I thought I would send you a quick email. I think it's important to be honest so I wanted to let you know that I think you are a terrific person and I enjoy hanging out with you. I don't want this to sound like a big deal but I have been thinking about "things" and I think it would be best for us to remain friends at this point. As mentioned before, I really enjoy spending time with you but I think our distance and your living situation may be difficult for me to deal with. Again, I don't want this to sound like a big deal because we really don't know each other that well but I wanted to be upfront with you. I would still like to hang out once in awhile when I come up to Reno if you would like. Let me know your thoughts....
Take care,
Johnny
Okay, here are my thoughts:
1) If you didn't want to get into a long distance relationship, don't contact girls who don't live near you.
2) When I told you about my living situation, you said you had no problem with it, and you had been in the same situation, so you understood. BS
3) This is why it is better to just cease contact. I didn't need this email - I fully understood your position when you didn't respond to my text. We went on two dates, no explanation is needed.
4) Nope, I don't want to hang out with you when you are in town. I will be too busy going on actual dates.
5) Yes, I realize #4 is sort of hypocritical, since Pharm was interested in me and now we just hang out as friends...but we're both fine with it, so it's okay :)
6) No, I didn't send this to him, instead I sent a very friendly, polite "I'm disappointed but not surprised, good luck with your search" type email.
6 comments:
Okay, so these "honest" Dear John's suck. So I have decided to post what he really should have said.
"Hope,
I know you are operating on only one lung right now. And I know it is only temporary! But when you were out of breath after only 10 minutes of Rock Band, I have to be honest, it freaked me out.
My last serious relationship was with a one-lunged woman. I don't want to go into detail, but it ended very badly. I..just..can't put myself through that again.
I am sorry.
Johnny"
See? That would have been better. Sometimes honesty is not the best policy.
I sense a lot of bitterness. C'mon you appreciate honesty more than anyone so why can't he be honest.
Also, a point that has been brought to my attention twice now by two men is that they would never feel ok with your living situation...just something to consider. Maybe it's time to move on/out and not have to explain that one. I have to say I wouldn't be keen on it if I guy I was dating was living with his ex. Just some thoughts.... :)
Yeah, the living situation is weird. I'd definitely steer clear of that if I were on the outside looking in.
Totally agreed. Everyone I've ever talked to about it (including guys) all think it would be a red flag to a potential suitor. Even if it makes total sense to you it will probably be really hard to find someone who's ok with it. I certainly wouldn't date a guy who was living with his ex because to me it would say that he hasn't moved on and I wouldn't want to get involved. But I think you already know my thoughts on this :)
Yes, I appreciate honesty, I just feel it wasn't really necessary at this stage.
About the living situation, I know. And I agree with all of you. Keep in mind that said roomie is only home maybe 2-3 nights a week, so it's not like I'm constantly running into him. If one of you would like to move up here and rent out the other room that would be great :)
Post a Comment